Ask500

David Letterman wrote this; it's the David we don't often see....

The other day I was reading Newsweek magazine and came across some Poll data I

found rather hard to believe. It must be true given the source, right?

The Newsweek poll alleges that 67 percent of Americans are unhappy with the

direction the country is headed and 69 percent of the country is unhappy with

the performance of the President. In essence 2/3 of the citizenry just ain't

happy and want a change. So being the knuckle dragger I am, I started thinking,

'What are we so unhappy about?'

A. Is it that we have electricity and running water 24 hours a day, 7 Days a

week?

B. Is our unhappiness the result of having air conditioning in the summer and

heating in the winter?

C. Could it be that 95.4 percent of these unhappy folks have a job?

D. Maybe it is the ability to walk into a grocery store at any time and see

more food in moments than Darfur has seen in the last year?

E. Maybe it is the ability to drive our cars and trucks from the Pacific Ocean

to the Atlantic Ocean without having to present identification papers as we

move through each state.

F. Or possibly the hundreds of clean and safe motels we would find along the way

that can provide temporary shelter?

G. I guess having thousands of restaurants with varying cuisine from around the

world is just not good enough either.

H. Or could it be that when we wreck our car, emergency workers show up and

provide services to help all and even send a helicopter to take you to the

hospital.

I. Perhaps you are one of the 70 percent of Americans who own a home.

J. You may be upset with knowing that in the unfortunate case of a fire, a group

of trained firefighters will appear in moments and use top notch equipment to

extinguish the flames thus saving you, your family, and your belongings.

K. Or if, while at home watching one of your many flat screen TVs, a burglar or

prowler intrudes, an officer equipped with a gun and a bullet-proof vest will

come to defend you and your family against attack or loss.

L. This all in the backdrop of a neighborhood free of bombs or militias raping

and pillaging the residents. Neighborhoods where 90% of teenagers own cell

phones and computers.

M. How about the complete religious, social and political freedoms we enjoy that

are the envy of everyone in the world?

Maybe that is what has 67% of you folks unhappy.

Fact is, we are the largest group of ungrateful, spoiled brats the world has

ever seen. No wonder the world loves the U.S. , yet has a great disdain for its

citizens. They see us for what we are. The most blessed people in the world who

do nothing but complain about what we don't have, and what we hate about the

country instead of thanking the good Lord we live here.

I know, I know. What about the president who took us into war and has no plan to

get us out? The president who has a measly 31 percent approval rating? Is this

the same president who guided the nation in the dark days after 9/11? The

president that cut taxes to bring an economy out of recession? Could this be

the same guy who has been called every name in the book for succeeding in

keeping all the spoiled ungrateful brats safe from terrorist attacks? The

commander in chief of an all-volunteer army that is out there defending you and

me?

Did you hear how bad the President is on the news or talk show? Did this news

affect you so much, make you so unhappy you couldn't take a look around for

yourself and see all the good things and be glad? Think about it......are you

upset at the President because he actually caused you personal pain OR is it

because the 'Media' told you he was failing to kiss your sorry ungrateful

behind every day.

Make no mistake about it. The troops in Iraq and Afghanistan have volunteered to

serve, and in many cases may have died for your freedom. There is currently no

draft in this country. They didn't have to go. They are able to refuse to go

and end up with either a ''general'' discharge, an 'other than honorable''

discharge or, worst case scenario, a ''dishonorable' discharge after a few days

in

the brig.

So why then the flat-out discontentment in the minds of 69 percent of

Americans?

Say what you want, but I blame it on the media. If it bleeds it leads and they

specialize in bad news. Everybody will watch a car crash with blood and guts.

How many will watch kids selling lemonade at the corner? The media knows this

and media outlets are for-profit corporations. They offer what sells, and when

criticized, try to defend their actions by 'justifying' them in one way or

another. Just ask why they tried to allow a murderer like O.J. Simpson to write

a book about how he didn't kill his wife, but if he did he would have done it

this way......Insane!

Turn off the TV, burn Newsweek, and use the New

York Times for the bottom of your bird cage. Then start being grateful for all

we have as a country. There is exponentially more good than bad. We are among

the most blessed people on Earth and should thank God several times a day, or

at least be thankful and appreciative.' 'With hurricanes, tornados, fires out

of control, mud slides, flooding, severe thunderstorms tearing up the country

from one end to another, and with the threat of bird flu and terrorist attacks,

'Are we sure this is a good time to take God out of the Pledge of Allegiance?

-David Letterman

I liked most of it until I got to the God bit at the end. What is it with Yanks and religiosity? Why this need to display at least a pretence of 'faith' at every opportunity? Will America ever grow up?

(Three interesting questions, as I am sure you will all agree).